Tag Archives: finding yourself

True Happiness

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1 Kings 11; 2 Chronicles 9, Ecclesiastes 1-3

You read about Solomon’s life and it’s tempting to think he had everything a man could dream of. Wealth that mirrored that of Bezos and Musk combined, he lived an indulgent, lavish lifestyle. He married 700 women and kept 300 more on the side. The man knew how to throw a party.

But when you read Ecclesiastes, you hear the voice of an empty man. You hear disillusionment and bitterness. You hear regret.

How can that be? Don’t most of us think that if we could just win the lottery, or earn that next million, or if we had power and popularity we’d be happily fulfilled? We certainly wouldn’t sound like Solomon, would we, if we had everything we ever dreamed of?

Solomon did what so many do – he thought he could ride the fence. He thought he could have one foot in the world following his own desires, and one foot following God. He found out you can’t be obedient and disobedient at the same time. You’re one or the other. Solomon was disobedient, and you hear the word “meaningless” repeated over and over when he’s describing the results of his choices.

My friend, your effort to “find yourself,” or “take care of yourself,” or “do what’s best for you,” will result in the same meaningless existence. Solomon knew (although we don’t see him ever surrendering his “self”) that :

without (God) who can eat or find enjoyment? To the man who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge, and happiness… (Ecclesiastes 2:25-26)

Solomon tried to find meaning on his own, apart from God, even though he knew the answer IS God. Knowing it, and surrendering to it are two different things, apparently.

Solomon would tell us today that you can’t “find” happiness. True happiness and meaning and enjoyment of life is a gift from God to those who choose obedience. And, dear ones, it doesn’t get better than that!

The Show Must Go On

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I remember, when Mom was dying of cancer, I would drive to work with a heavy heart. Most mornings I would cry as I talked to God about Mom. But when I got to the stop light a mile from school, I would dry my tears and take a few deep breaths. And before walking into the office, I’d put my hand on the doorknob, breathe again, put a smile on my face, and pray, “God, let’s do this. I need you to go in there with me today.” I didn’t want to be there. I wanted time with Mom. I wanted to be alone in my grief. But I was a middle school counselor, and I had a job to do.

It was hard. And listening to the familiar complaints of 11-year-olds tested my patience like never before. Suzie took my pencil. Billy made fun of me. Nobody likes me. The teacher yelled at me. Even the: Mom grounded me or worse, didn’t separate me from my own pain.

But I loved my job, loved those children, and it wasn’t their fault my mother was dying.

I realized today Jesus knows exactly how I felt. His cousin, John, was murdered. His heart must have hurt like mine did. And he needed to be alone. He needed time to grieve. So he went off to a remote place to be by himself.

But the crowds followed him. They had needs only Jesus could meet. So Jesus put a smile on his face, and preached, and healed their sick.

Did you know the feeding of the 5,000 from five loaves and 2 fish happened in the midst of Jesus’ grief? (Matthew 14, Mark 6, Luke 9) He had compassion on those needy, demanding, insensitive people, even when his own heart was broken.

I know some of you are going through hardships of your own. Sickness, finances, relationships can cause us to live with the burden of grief on our shoulders. Yet that doesn’t stop the “Mommy, Mommy, Mommy”, or “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy,” demands from your children, or the deadlines your boss gives you at work, or the electric from being turned off for lack of payment. Life goes on even when we want it to just stop for one minute.

Jesus knows what that feels like. Jesus shows us by example that sometimes the show must go on. Sometimes we have to choose to let God pick us up and help us meet our responsibilities even if we don’t feel like it.

But here’s something else Jesus teaches by example. He made time to get alone and pray. (Matthew 14:23) He didn’t go off to “find himself”. He spent time talking to God.

That’s where our society might be wrong. It says we’ve got to be happy before we can make someone else happy. Put yourself first and things will get better.

But doesn’t Jesus teach us something different? Didn’t he take “self” out of the picture? Didn’t he place God first, others second, and himself after that? I’m thinking if it worked for him, it probably will work for us, too.

Pray, dear one. Pour yourself out before God, give him yourself and your circumstances. Ask him to empower you to be who he wants you to be in the midst of your pain. Bathe yourself in prayer, then trust God to be exactly what you need him to be. Yes, the show must go on. But you don’t have to go on solo. If you know Jesus as your Savior, you have someone who has been there, to guide you, to strengthen you, and to love you like no one else can.

If we take the world’s advise and concentrate on ourselves, we are concentrating on the wrong person. Concentrate on God. Notice the opportunities he gives you to minister to someone else. Take him up on his offer to never leave or forsake you. (Deuteronomy 31:6, Hebrews 13:5-8)

Is that a recipe for a trouble-free life? What do you think?

It is, however, a recipe proven by Jesus himself, to be exactly what we need to face the worse life hands us. And to be victors. And to let others see Jesus in us.

God, I pray for grieving people today. Some have burdens that are breaking them. Father, I pray they will come to you and lay that burden down. Give them strength. Give them purpose. Help them to look to you instead of looking within themselves. And may they find peace from allowing you to be exactly what they need to get through today. May they feel your love right this minute. And may Jesus be seen in and through them as they walk through this storm.