Monthly Archives: November 2025

Unwholesome Talk

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1 Timothy 6:3-5

What is unwholesome talk? Certainly coarse language falls under that umbrella. There’s nothing wholesome about gossip, either. Paul says false doctrine is unwholesome.

Unwholesome talk reveals a prideful person, someone who doesn’t know what he’s talking about, and he doesn’t realize how foolish he sounds. He often just likes to hear himself speak.

Unwholesome talk leads to envy, strife, reviling, and evil suspicions. I had to think about that for a bit. But you know if you listen to gossip, you begin to suspect what you are hearing is true. It can change the way you feel toward someone. Unwholesome talk drives a wedge between people, and that does not honor God.

Paul says this about unwholesome talk: it is the useless wrangling of men of corrupt minds and destitute of truth.

Ouch.

The idea of unwholesome talk has been heavy on my heart lately. I won’t go into details but it is what is causing strife, hurt feelings, discord among people I love, just like Paul warned. I wish I could say I’ve remained faultless.

James tells us to control our tongue, that what comes out of our mouths reveals what is in our hearts. I don’t think we stop and consider the power in our words, or the fact that those words are like an x-ray into our souls.

I don’t want my conversations to be described as the wrangling of a woman with a corrupt mind, destitute of truth. I represent Jesus, after all. I am His voice to a lost world. My words matter.

And so do yours.

Honoring Parents

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1 Timothy 5:2-8

Many families in our society are so disconnected. It seems a lot of young people move away from their hometowns as soon as they are able, to follow a job, or look for a better life somewhere else, or because they marry someone from another place. There are some good and honest reasons to relocate. And, unlike my generation, younger generations seem to be able to pick up and move many times during their lives.

Two of my sisters stayed in our hometown and raised their families close to our parents. I think they and their children would agree that proximity was a blessing. Two of their children have also stayed in our hometown and are raising their children close to their parents, my sisters and their husbands. Grandmas and Grandpas who love to babysit, who go to soccer games and school programs and buy every fund raising candy bar the kids are selling. But the majority of our family is scattered throughout the country.

There’s nothing wrong with moving away. There’s nowhere in the Bible that says, “Thou shalt live next door to Mom and Dad.” But we have to admit that living away from our parents makes caring for them more difficult. We are not off the hook, however, just because of the miles between us.

Caring for parents from a distance often looks like finding a nursing home or hiring a sitter to take care of them. To some people, it seems caring for their parents looks like an occasional phone call. Others actually think this command to honor our parents doesn’t apply to them because their parents weren’t perfect, so they cut them off, repaying evil for evil.

The Apostle Paul tells us if we aren’t caring for our parents we are worse than unbelievers. Yes, he is specifically talking about caring for widows. But come on. It’s not a stretch to say what he is proposing is in line with the commandment God gave Moses.

The fifth Commandment doesn’t say honor only Christian parents, or honor only parents who didn’t mess you up, or honor parents who you think deserve your care. It says honor your parents.

What does that look like? You honor your parents when you take care of their physical and emotional needs, when you show them the respect they deserve as your parents. Maybe it means you become a better son or daughter than they were as a parent.

Next week is Thanksgiving, a time when the pressure of family is felt most deeply in our country. I hope you are looking forward to family time, helping Mom with the food and cleanup, or going out of your way to get Dad to the table. This time of year makes the loneliness of separation heavier than usual. Take care of your parents.

That’s what is pleasing to God. Plus, it’s not an option if you are a Christian.

Getting Along

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1 Timothy 5:1-2

We call the Church a family of faith, but families aren’t always functional. Families can be plagued with jealousy, contempt, resentment, fighting, and hatred. Families can be plagued with co-dependency, control, unrealistic expectations, unfair treatment, and abuse. The word “family” isn’t always a picture of a loving group of people who are gathered together. Next week is Thanksgiving. Not every table will have harmony.

I’ve been asked what it was like growing up with five girls in the family (with one bathroom). Some have marveled that we are all still friends after seventy years. I tell people we weren’t allowed to not get along. We were raised to be friends.

That’s not to say there was never conflict. We are human. There was tension and disagreements on occasion. But I don’t remember getting away with harsh words toward one another. Mom and Dad never laughed at or ignored those times of conflict. (my sisters might remember things differently. But I doubt it).

Paul tells Timothy that we should treat each other in the church like family. For some that might bring to mind an unhappy picture. But in these two verses I think we can read that we are to treat each other with gentleness when there is an issue, be respectful. And I think that’s easier done if a problem is addressed immediately, before it gets out of hand.

And, I think this might be the key to a functional and loving family of faith: God is saying we are not allowed to not get along.

Godliness

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1 Timothy 3:14-16

Who is the most godly person you know? What qualities do you see that point to godliness in him or her?

I think of one of the ladies in my Sunday School class. She’s a woman grounded in the truth of Scripture. She is a prayer warrior. She has a quiet strength. She is refined, self-controlled, compassionate, kind, joyful, humble, faithful, wise, and generous. She has a servant’s heart and doesn’t seek recognition for the things she does. She feeds the hurting and ill people in our family of faith, sends cards and flowers, makes telephone calls, stays connected with many who have moved away. And most of the time her deeds are known only between her and the one who receives the blessing from her. Check out Proverbs 31. You might see her there.

This dear lady looks very much like Christ in her. She’s probably not perfect, although I can’t see a whole lot of imperfection. Godliness is not perfection. At least not yet.

But if Christ is in us, His character ought to be recognizable in us, too. My friend is still growing, still learning, still pursuing God as she loves and serves Him. I think that’s what Paul is recommending for Timothy (and us) here in these verses.

Take a good look at Jesus, then strive to be like Him, press on toward that goal, it’s not you or I who live but Christ living in and through us. Let our conduct in our homes, in our churches, our neighborhoods be a result of deep-seated loyalty and devotion to our Lord.

I pray that you are the most godly person in someone’s life. If not today, then soon as you grow in grace and knowledge of Jesus, as you submit daily to Him, and allow His Spirit to bear fruit in your life.

He deserves that.

May you be blessed and a blessing today.

It’s Great To Be A Woman

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1 Timothy 3:1-7

When the Bible talks about how to be a good wife, it’s tempting to turn a deaf ear. I’ve never been a wife or mother, and at this stage of life I never will be. So, move on God. We’ve got nothing to talk about in this area.

Or do we? A good wife is a good woman, isn’t she? Shouldn’t how to be a good woman apply to me? OK, God. Point taken.

In chapter three of his first letter to Timothy, Paul talks about the qualities necessary for a pastor. But these qualities are just as important for godly men and women no matter our vocational calling. Things like:

blameless
temperate
sober-minded
hospitable
having good behavior
having a good reputation outside of church

As a Christ-follower those traits should be evident and maturing every day in me. But there are places in Scripture that speak specifically to women, and our role in God’s kingdom work. In addition to the characteristics listed above we are to add:

helper (Genesis 2:18)
submissive (Ephesians 5:22-24)
respectful (Ephesians 5:33)
love for family (Titus 2:4)
trustworthiness (Proverbs 31:11-12)
serving others, helping the afflicted, and devotion (1 Timothy 5:10)

Wow! Taking a look at a woman’s role in God’s kingdom work makes me realize we aren’t less than men in any way. If fact, women seem to be necessary for men, their anchor, their charging-station, the shelter and encouragement they need in order to serve God in obedience to Him.

Why do we think we have to compete? Why blur the lines when the lines were drawn by a loving God who doesn’t make mistakes.

What a privilege to be a women in God’s kingdom work. You don’t have to take on the work intended for men in order to feel special or useful. You have enough to do, important things to do in your role as a godly woman.

We are all equal in the sight of God. And we are all equally important to Him in our separate roles.

Am I saying women shouldn’t be behind the pulpit? I’m not. But God clearly is. I don’t believe God would “call” someone to a position that opposes His written Word.

“But I don’t like being in the back ground. I like to be out front, in control, lauded and applauded.” Then I’m thinking you might have a pride-problem.

Study for yourself the beautiful role God has designed for women. We’ve strayed. But I don’t think it’s too late to humble ourselves and pick up the banner He has laid out for us. Strong homes, strong men and fathers, strong churches depend on the strong women who are working diligently to be the women God intends them to be.

What a privilege! It’s great to be a woman in God’s kingdom work.

If Not You

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1 Timothy 1:3-11

Paul left Timothy in Ephesus and gave him the responsibility of guarding the truth against false doctrine and those who were teaching it. Makes me wonder who is guarding the truth today. Or are the things Paul warned Timothy about not applicable in 2025?

The thing is, I don’t think false doctrine is a result of evil men sitting around a table in a dark, smoke-filled room with Satan, coming up with strategies to derail the Gospel. I think it generally comes from good men wanting the Gospel to be inviting, fun, attractive, and accepted by all. What could be wrong in that, right?

I think these are probably praying men, but not listening men. They may tell God what they’re going to do for Him, without hearing what He wants from them. They use Scripture, but they don’t understand it.

The Church has used “church-speak” for so long the words have taken on false meaning without us realizing it.

“God is love,” has come to mean God accepts everyone.

“Don’t judge,” means what is right for me doesn’t have to be right for you.

“Enter his court with praise,” means worship ought to be fun, our demonstration equal to that of a football fan at the Super Bowl, an experience that leaves us with a euphoric, spiritual high.

Do you recognize the subtle falseness that renders such doctrine fruitless? How can we recognize the counterfeit? By studying the real thing. Our time in the Bible ought to exceed our time listening to sermons, reading commentaries and religious literature.

Bank tellers learn to recognize counterfeit bills, not by studying the counterfeit, but by studying the real thing so that they can recognize ANY deviation.

Do you want to guard the truth? Read your Bible. Read it again. Read it often. Memorize it. Think on it. Let it become so real to you that you can recognize ANY deviation.

Then what? Is it enough for you to know the truth? If we are to guard the truth we need to speak up. Question. Point out errors. Hold each other accountable for what we believe and say.

If not you – who?

Stay Out of the Fire

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James 1

I watched part of an interview with Erika Kirk this morning. She was asked if she wanted a public apology from Jimmy Kimmel for the lies he told about Charlie’s assassination. She said the show did reach out to her and asked how they could make it right. Her answer to them was, “This is not our issue.” She went on to say that forcing an apology didn’t interest her, that this issue isn’t between the two of them, but between Jimmy and God. She said she didn’t want or need an apology. Case closed.

What I got from what she said about that is that she refuses to enter into a battle with Kimmel over what he said. A public apology to make himself look human wasn’t on her agenda. Jimmy was not on her agenda. No hatred or anger on her part. Simply disinterest, and removing herself from a volatile situation.

Why can’t we all have that attitude when someone wrongs us? Why immediately jump into the ring, start swinging, and make it bigger than it ought to be?

“Well she disrespected me.” or “He started it…”

Just because someone started a fire, doesn’t mean you have to go stand in the flames.

James tells us, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger, for human anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness.” (1:19b-29)

Is accomplishing God’s righteousness on your agenda? The old “what would Jesus do?” is a questions we might ask ourselves. When they lied about him he opened not his mouth. He picked his. battles. And so should we.

I hear God say today, accomplishing God’s righteousness ought to be our goal. I might get my feelings hurt today. You might have someone pull out in front of you in traffic. We might be lied about, gossiped about, judged unfairly. How do we accomplish God’s righteousness in those situations?

Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.

You don’t go and jump into the flames just because someone started a fire.